Eyedrops Suck 16 January 2001

1:27 PM: Wow, I am, like, so blind right now. I have the browser font cranked up to Large-Type Reader's Digest size and I can just barely make out the letters. Am I tripping? Sadly, no. Just back from the ophthamologist (and what is with that 'ph' anyway?), to find out why I have these spots in my eyes. He put these drops in my eyes that turned me into a Bil Keane painting, and then shone a lot of really bright lights into them. I don't know if that was part of the exam per se or just one of the way he gets through his day.

Anyways, the good news, I guess, is that he said I don't have cataracts. The bad news is that the pressure in my right eye is high. I didn't know I was supposed to inflate them in the first place. Oh, that part was a lot of fun too - I was supposed to hold my head in this padded frame while he poked me in the eye with a glowing blue probe. Now come on here, I've seen this episode of Star Trek, I know what that does. He had to have his assistant come in and hold my head down to keep me from jerking it back. Quite peeved about that he was, too. Sorry dude. I don't even like water in my eyes, I sure as hell don't like glowing blue probes in them. I did notice that it was a lot easier to handle when he poked at my left eye than it was for my right. Whatever that means.

So I have to go back next week. Glaucoma. Lovely. Wonder if that's diabetes-related? Never did go in for blood work. Thanks, Dad.

In other news, I actually did some laundry yesterday. Amazing. Just my way of remembering Dr. King, especially the way I do it - black shirts and white shirts and orange shirts and green shirts are all washed together, judged not by the color of their threads but by the content of their contamination. (And yes, I am going to Hell for writing this, thanks for asking.)

Also read The Constant Gardener, the new John le Carre book. Yummy. Not as plot-oriented as his work usually is, since both you and the main characters have an idea fairly early of exactly what happened. But as with most of his recent post-Cold-War books, the focus is on the transformation of the lead character. How the tools and habits formed by service to the Powers That Be can be the most effective things to use against them, usually in the interest of fighting for something that represents the values that those same Powers claim to honor but seldom do. That kind of inside-out world makes it hard to put people down in the Good and Bad columns with any neatness, which just makes it that much more interesting. His writing is wonderful as well. Napping and good book, happy day.

Now, to find out if I can see the Solitaire deck while I wait for my eyesight to come back. And to think I was thinking wow, I'll get into work early Today...

2:56 PM: Ack!!!!!

9:32 PM: Shots Were Fired Dept.: "Michel indicated that Kabila's death might not have been the result of a coup, as had been earlier suggested. The minister said there were several possible scenarios ``which do not correspond to a coup, but rather to a disagreement which led to violence resulting in President Kabila being shot.''"

Willfully blind self-indulgent nebbish or amusingly quirky old coot? And how bout that local sports team? Discuss among yourselves.

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All names are fake, most places are real, the author is definitely unreliable but it's all in good fun. Yep. © 1998-1999 Lighthouse for the Deaf. All rights reserved and stuff. The motto at the top of the page is a graffito I saw on Brunswick Street in Melbourne.