4 March 1999
5:28 PM: Why I love Slashdot.org:Perfect tie knot mathematically foundPunditry at its most succinct, that last bit.
Posted by CmdrTaco on Thursday
March 04, @03:17PM
from the what-geek-wears-a-suit? dept.
An anonymous reader writes "Thomas Fink and Yong Mao of Cambridge University's Cavendish Laboratory have discovered six new "aesthetically pleasing" tie knots. Now that the perfect tie knot has been mathematically proven, will geeks everywhere flock to ties?" No.
Snack! today is Handi-Snacks, which sounds like, oh, all sorts of things, but is in fact only Cheez'n'Crackers or Cheez'n'Breadsticks. The spelling is important, as it is not really cheese as such, and the good folks at Kraft would never want to mislead us. Speaking of whom, I see that they've now come out with Easy Mac macaroni & cheese dinners. For those of us who found regular mac & cheese just, like, way too complex, dude. Food pills, food pills....
8:19: Mmmmmmmmm, bad girls.... Must say, Reese Witherspoon as the class virgin is pretty much a canonical definition of "suspension of disbelief". Now if this would just play on a triple bill with 200 Cigarettes and Jawbreaker somewhere, that'd be value for money. Oh, Strand, dear Strand, we miss you. How much can it cost to run a cheapass stinky downtown movie theater, anyway? How rich do I have to get before I can do it as a hobby? That'd be a goal: The official Lighthouse for the Deaf Bookstore & Cinematheque. Now with special illegal smoking section! I could even stand to do marketing for 10 years to make that happen.
9:57: Remarkable. I seem to be done. As done as I can get considering some of it doesn't work, but I don't know what to do about that. If I did I'd be doing it or have already done it, now wouldn't I? have? that. thing. Yes. Hello? Lunch. No, night. Bear claw, OK OK.
Have you ever seen that a band - let's call them, say, Sleater-Kinney - is coming to town, and thought, "Hey, I have that CD, I still've never really listened to it much," and so you go and you do, and realize that holy ravioli, this is really good, this is make-you-nervous hair-standing good, and you think what excellent luck that they're coming to town, and then you look up the listings and find out that a) it's tonight and b) it's been sold out for weeks already, which everyone else already knew of course because they, possesing a clue, also already knew that this band was itchy-tension great and didn't have to wait to be hit on the head to figure it out?
Sucks, doesn't it?
Willfully blind self-indulgent nebbish or amusingly quirky old coot? And how bout that local sports team? Discuss among yourselves.
All names are fake, most places are real, the author is definitely unreliable but it's all in good fun. Yep.
© 1998-1999 Lighthouse for the Deaf. All rights reserved and stuff.
The motto at the top of the page is a graffito I saw on Brunswick Street in Melbourne.