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101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-12 06:45:45

1) To annoy people.

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Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Wash! on 2004-03-12 08:42:19  |  Reply to this
  2) To smell. Bad.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-13 03:50:36  |  Reply to this
  Smoking helps fat people to diet.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-13 03:56:58  |  Reply to this
  4) Smoking improves the taste of cheap cider.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Wash! on 2004-03-15 02:13:03  |  Reply to this
  5) It will kill you, your relatives, your neighbours... Fact.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-15 08:29:03  |  Reply to this
  6) It gives pride back to unemployed smokers,as 90% of the cost of ciggies is tax.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-15 08:30:40  |  Reply to this
  7) It makes you look cool.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-15 08:33:33  |  Reply to this
  8) It's fun to make smoke rings.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Wash! on 2004-03-15 09:49:08  |  Reply to this
  9) They taste a gerzilion times better than those fake Kamikazee (?) ones - y'know, the fag shaped chocolate wrapped in (apparently) edible paper.
Re: Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Kid on 2004-03-15 13:27:31  |  Reply to this
  (gazillion, I believe, makes it sound more like a number) But damn straight....
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-03-18 08:19:17  |  Reply to this
  10) Helps to cover-up the smell of dogs in the house.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by keith, canberra on 2004-03-30 01:49:37  |  Reply to this
  isn't that a reason to keep dogs in the house?
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Ferrit Rancher on 2004-03-30 11:43:12  |  Reply to this
  Because what else are you going to do with a half empty box of filter tips? Soak up incredibly small puddles of senile drool? Build tiny flotillas to prevent a speading oil slick in a fish tank? Keep on chuffin'
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-04-03 02:03:54  |  Reply to this
  10) Ciggies are ideal for those embaressing silent moments in a conversation just after a family member announces they are gay or are suffering from a terminal illness,or are planing to vote republican (is that spelt right). There is nothing to beat lighting-up and feddling with your fag.
Re: Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Kid on 2004-04-04 07:12:31  |  Reply to this
  I suspect it is NOT spelled right, unless your family member is flying somewhere in order to vote Republican
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Wash! on 2004-04-03 11:26:09  |  Reply to this
  12) (you missed out 11): Its a great excuse to go over and start chatting to the fittest girl, not only in the pub, but quite possibly in this world, as my mate did just the other day, to ask for a cigarette! - a foreign accent never goes amiss with this one too.

(Feel free to copy/paste into 1001 chat up lines that never work, excluding the foreign accent bit).
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Kid on 2004-04-04 07:13:31  |  Reply to this
  12) Smoking kills. We all have nemeses? So actively passive smoking them to death.....yes. I know, but I liked the sound of it.
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Wash! on 2004-04-04 15:11:28  |  Reply to this
  14) (Keep count, Kids: I.D missed out 11, putting 10 twice instead. I rectified that, by jumping to 12. And now some gimp, with whom ive just enjoyed a most satisfying pint of orange soda, and given a thrashing of 4-2 games to pool, put the demons back where they belong, in missing out 13. So... this is 14. Next one is 15, ok?) Cigarettes have approximately the same circumference as a pen or pencil. Thus, if bored in the classroom or in the office, one can fake smoking a cigarette without the hastle of finding an appropriate prop. 'Coz we always have pencils or pens at hand, no?
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-04-05 08:29:06  |  Reply to this
  Ciggies were made for stigmatas. Stub out a fag on each hand and you can get into Annabelle's (London) nightclub for nothing!
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Kid on 2004-04-07 01:11:50  |  Reply to this
  14. Merciful Zeus! People (not me this time) do insist upon not having numbered these things correctly. Cigarettes come in packets of twenty, so for the moment, you could write one of these reasons on each of them...for counting's sake. A ha ha ha three ah ha ha ha....

15. It gives you something to have in your hand if you either have to (a) Drink orange soda - no Wash doesn't smoke or (b - 16) Can't play pool. Or rather, wipe the floor with Wash who mops up at the end. He did deserve to win, but I didn't deserve to lose. Well...a draw would've been a fairer result. I don't know. I've got to give credit to the lads, they gave it everything today. The fans were great out there, and I did it for them, really. Its great for everyone at the club.

Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by I.D on 2004-04-10 03:47:14  |  Reply to this
  17) Smoking is a good reason to start-up your your own Zippo lighter collecton...anyone got a pink (manly pink that is) zippo they what to swap?
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by [no name] on 2004-05-15 15:58:45  |  Reply to this
  ... because cancer, wrinkles, bad odor, ugly teeth and death are sooo cool, man!
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Mother Earth on 2004-05-15 20:53:09  |  Reply to this
  Learn how to count please, and number 22,smoking is the number one source for statistics, 23 it gives people jobs, 24 you can have your family in debt over their heads becuase you owe so much money to doctors becuase of all the therapy you had to go through because you had cancer, 25 if its a dry season you can throw your cigarette out the window catch a field on fire just so you can have a nice drive and a firework show, 26 great stress reliever who cares about psychiatrist
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Mother Earth on 2004-05-15 21:21:50  |  Reply to this
  Oh wait I have just thought of new reasons, number 27, 28, & 29 ejaculation volume reduced sperm count reduced and sperm are less able to penetrate the ovum now maybe you won't have to worry about getting women pregnant, 30 now you can have graves' disease HAPPY BIRTHDAY I know you have always wanted and over-active thyroid gland, 31 your immune system is impared now you won't have to live that long YAY,32 fertility is 30% less for smoking women I hope you weren't looking forward to actually birthing children, 32 you can now get over your stress but wait what about depression, 33now you can have nystagmus isn't it cool when your eyes look left when you want to look right, 34 ooh optic nueropathy isn't it great not being able to see what is right in front of you face, 35 you also have a 50% of getting posoriasis. So I hope you keep on smoking!
Re: Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Ferrit on 2004-05-17 13:39:43  |  Reply to this
  Just pleased to see someone getting in the word 'ejaculation'. Even when talking about the gravest of matters, it makes me smile. And giggle like a child of four, wired up to an electric clown/'offender'. That jiggles and laughs and makes you want to scream Merde La Vache! I think...
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Megs on 2004-05-18 02:55:42  |  Reply to this
  Because otherwise college smoking areas would be redundent
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Megs on 2004-05-18 02:56:20  |  Reply to this
  Because if you do you are a quitter!
Re: 101 Reasons To keep-On Smoking by Megs on 2004-05-18 02:57:50  |  Reply to this
  Because otherwise all those expensive lighters in the world would be mainly redundant!